Funds Drive - Every Bit Helps

- -Dollars- -
Sorry for the lack of post yesterday, the upcoming weeks will be a tough one for those who love Giant Crab. Giant Crab is currently asking for a funds drive. We need to start taking large steps towards preparation for the Year of Proliferation. While any money I receive that does not go to basic human needs, immediately goes to Giant Crab, we ask that you donate any extra income you can part with. After the Year of Proliferation, currency will be meaningless, but for now, we need a steady income to help plan for Giant Crab's campaign. After the fiasco a few years back we will not be searching outward for a campaign manager this election. The last time we hired a non-believer, he was a complete moron. He did not understand the majesty of Giant Crab, and since Giant Crab does not grant visitation rights, the heathen was properly disposed of. Therefore, it is with great humility that I accept Giant Crab's nomination as campaign leader for the Year of Proliferation. I could never express the joy and honor I feel in a human's language, so I will simply pledge on my own life that we will have victory in 2008. A meaningless gesture for we know what happens to those who fail Giant Crab. I feel no pressure or intimidation with the task at hand. I am helping Giant Crab. Helping Giant Crab's plans come to fruition may be the easiest thing I have ever done. I will not let us down. Fill your hearts with Giant Crab, and remember...
A VOTE FOR GIANT CRAB IS A VOTE FOR A BIGGER CRAB